story of my life

story of my life

well.. i want to tell you about my experience in all of my life. i dedicated this for all of you when you think that  life is so suck or yah something like that. know it that life is beautiful if you can enjoy it and accept it whatever it happens. dont worry about a bad things that will block your way, make it as a new experience to be a better person to step forward.

know it that if you step forward, it wasnt easy as it looks, it need's knowledge to be smarter and can find the way out from a problem that you'll face. the only way to earn the knowledge is just from an experience and to earn new experience is to accept all what we got and make it enjoy! i will tell you my life story and know this, don't always look people that have a better life but look people that was more bad than you! if you can do that than means that you can accept all of your problem and make it as a lesson to step forward..

okay my life begins in october, 11 in 1995. i born on indonesia (surabaya town). I live in a less harmonious family but i'm still accept it with a smile because God never been so kind to give my a beautiful life even i live in a less harmonious family. my father and my mother is like dog and a cat if you know, never get a peace at all.

i grow like such children like usual, playing like the others and always smile whenever i facing a problem.when i was 4, my mother decide me to send me to school and that's my first time to meet somebody that i'm not recognized at all. day by day have been through, i know one by one of them and i realize now that desire will not be achieved if there is no willingness to do so, so i try to do what suppose to do in the school. i try to talk to anyone that i meet so i can know who is him/her/

im a little shy guy on school so that's why i don't have so many friends on school. day by day have been through again and in 2003 my father divorce my mother because my mother choosing her family than him, that's why my father left her but im not take too deep so that pain will not be so hurt at all. and the truth is i'm still love him and im waiting for him to came back to my life and happy again like the old time.

before my father left me, i have a new sister and i was so happy so my father too. i dont know why my father became so happy like never before, and my mom feel like in heaven because my father now is new not my old father that always make my mom cry. ahh i feel like i was in heaven too because what my father did but it just last for a few months and my father back to his old ways. he make my mom cry and cry again.. i dont know what to do with it except go out with my friends and play some games with him while my age was 8 and not long then my father left my mom and i alone while my mom is pregnant again..

i dont know what to do because my mom on pregnant condition and cant be stressed out so i calm my mom but it wasn't worked. one day, my father families have pick me up to live with them, i accept it because im not hate my father and his family at all. they said that they will make me a good person one day and i just believe it. my life on my father families wasn't lucky like what i think of, torture have been happen there from hitting me with a belt and with a broom. but i think its fine because i was a bad boy maybe. when i was 12, i decide to escape from my father family to my mom house because im not resistant with that torture anymore! in that day, i dont know where's my mother house but i need to find it where and finally i found out where. my mom as shocked because i was back to my mom house and she hug me like never before and she said "why you here?"

"i'm escaping mom"

"what? why?"

"it wasn't house mom but a prison!"

and then my mom accept me and we live happy again even without a father and luckily they not searching for me!

where's problem faced is where i'm now can think and flash it back where it happens. my mind got confused and my life had been separated from happines and that's when i 17, no more smiles, no more joke, no more me i feel but i dont want everyone to see that i facing so many problem and the way is i'm still keep my smile back when im with my friends even the smile wasn't like before..

drink? yeah i ever do that.. somebody said that drink a beer or vodka can make your probems away from your mind, so i do that almost everyday in my life. first time when i drunk till my head feel so fly its true that can make your problem out of your mind but, second, third, fourth it doesn't take any effect except make your head sick. i really hate that and i swore never drink something like that again. i know its not good for my body and i stop that. Someday, God show me that drink is not good for my body, one of my friend got a serious sick because of drink and i thanked to God that He still remind me even im a bad guy in His eyes.

my school got broked, its like everything had taken away from my life. but i still pretend it because i have motivation, know it that motivation for your life can make you do a thing's that people think its IMPOSSIBLE.

One day, my mom send me to anoher school and hope that i can change my destiny. in there, i meet a new friends and from that i can take my problem away even just once. i know its not a good idea for send me to school again because my mom economy is so bad, but i must complete my mission as student whatever it happens. someday, i meet somebody in my class and she was so different with all many girls that i met. Is that love? ask on my mind, so i started to text her and what i feel is bigger and bigger then one day i propose her to be my girlfriend. first she reject it, but im still hoping she will accept it, second she reject it, im still hoping and more bigger than first, and the third she accept it. i feel so happy and promise to her to make her happy whatever it happens. day by day i through my relationship without a fight even once. my problem seems gone with her, i can smile like the old times and i feel like in heaven for the second time. one day, problem began to appear with my girlfriend but we can through it until one day she broke this relationship. i feel so sad and my heart was completely broke, now the days have become more dark than before. my life has 100% broken and i dont know what to do. it ever crossed on my mind to do suicide but, something has stopped me out from that thing. I know its God who stopped that, so i through my life alone again and face the problem by myself. i know it look so fool when i still loving her until now but, what can i do? i dont care even she doesn't love me anymore but in here, im still loving her and it will always like that. whenever i saw her on school, my heart feel's like broked up to two.. i know its so sick but i still loving her and can't be replaced with anything. my friend told me that i should let her go and find a new one because there's many girl's outside that waiting for you, if she was your mate, then she will come back to you and if she wasn't, then you will find a girl that can make you more happy than her. "im sorry but i can't.. i still love her and it always be" said me..

i dont know what to do right now and God tell to me that i must through the day, dont worry that I always be in your side tell God to me. so right now i still walking thru the day even i cannot smile like the old times anymore but i must do it..

so what can i tell you from this story?

1. never give up with your life because nobody is perfect and look people below you, he/she face many problem than you

2. always be grateful for what you have because so many people that want it but still cant afford it

3. always love her/him and keep it because if you not do so, he/she will left you and he/she will never get back to you
4. take your problem easy and always enjoy it and you will learn from it

life is not what we see, is about what we do~

-steven